It takes you a while to realize what has actually happened to you.
One bright morning you wake up from a disturbing dream and realize that the dream has become your life.
Just like that.
But the impending despair!
The clock ticking up above
Like a pen counting all the joy you have
Just to take it away
The major problem is the admission.
You cannot sit down and admit to yourself that you are in fact in trouble.
How can you, when the world sees you to be so independent that you assume yourself to be that way.
The shame.
Oh the shame.
You seek pardon.
You seek exoneration.
But you dont really.
Why deny yourself the little sense of adventure, the torment, the torture.
Its bound to end anyway.
Make the most it.
Divulge in the pain.
Let the worries worry you.
Be sad and yet hopeful.
Torment yourself beacause its the only way out.
Sadistic it maybe. But what other choice do you have?
Its pathetic really the way one depends on others to make them happy.
Its vicious.
Evil.
Blasphemous.
Inevitable.
:(
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